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Dealing with emotional abuse in same-sex marriages

It is the taboo topic many women won't talk about with even their closets friends — emotional abuse between two female partners.

But men don't hold the trademark on unhealthy relationship patterns, and many female same-sex couples find themselves caught up in a devastating cycle of toxic behavior. Some signs of emotionally abusive marriages and partnerships may include:

-- Saying or doing things to make the other insecure in the relationship, such as capitalizing on inherent fears or vulnerabilities.

-- Creating a different version of reality in order to rewrite the history of your relationship. It's said there are three points of view: yours, theirs and the truth, but some spouses are dismissive of the other's complaints to the point of hostility. If your spouse manipulates you into doubting your own version of events, it is quite troubling.

-- Playing on your emotions by holding you responsible for their overwhelming emotional responses to relationship stressors. Emotional outbursts can take the form of explosive anger, suicidal threats, crying jags and other non-productive behaviors that impede real communication.

-- Applying sexual pressure. It can be hard for a woman to admit that another woman is bullying her into sex when she doesn't want it or pressuring her to perform acts outside her comfort zone. Even if the pressure is only verbal, this can be construed as abusive in a relationship.

There are many more ways that same-sex relationships turn toxic and emotionally abusive. If you are in a marriage where you no longer feel emotionally safe, it may be time to seek legal advice about ending your marriage and protecting yourself from your abusive partner.

Source: shewired.com, "12 Signs You Could Be in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship," Sasha Garwood, Aug. 04, 2015

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